Flashback Friday: "Summer Girls" - LFO (1999)

Okay, so it's been a bit of a bad week, what with Nicki Minaj, Paul Anka, and bad country artist whose name doesn't matter. But I feel as though all that pain can be washed away with this wonderful song from 1999, "Summer Girls" by LFO.

This is poetry. No matter what you think of music, this is pure, unadulterated poetry.

New Kids On The Block had a bunch of hits
Chinese food makes me sick

This level of intellectualism in writing can only be matched by the great William Shakespeare... say, don't they reference The Bard at one point?

Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets

Wow. I'm sure if William Shakespeare was alive today, he would be honoured to be referenced in such a wonderful piece of lyricism. Called "Billy", no less, to roll with the times!

Okay, if we can talk seriously for a second, this song is terrible. But I love it anyway.

I'm pretty sure this is meant to be terrible, and it does that job very well. All the non sequiturs in this song just add up to a glorious mess. It almost reads like a parody of late 90's feel-good summer rock.

"And I want something else... to get me through this... Chinese food makin' me sick, baby, baby..."

This song just reeks of not caring, but in this song it's actually kind of funny because of how obvious it is. Like, this is the first draft of their song. They put no thought into editing or retooling it. Chinese food made them sick, and they called it a day.

Every time I hear a random line thrown into this narrative just for the sake of rhyming, I laugh my ass off.

You love hip hop and rock n roll
Dad took off when you were 4 years old

There was a good man named Paul Revere

...Paul Revere?

I feel much better baby when you're near

...oh, because it rhymes with "near"! Okay, it all makes sense now.

This song is just ridiculous in all the right ways. It's a slap in the face to those who like mindless summer jams by providing the most mindless summer jam possible. And as someone who likes those types of songs, I salute LFO for reaching that milestone. Say, what does LFO stand for anyway?

Lyte Funkie Ones? Oh, the story behind this group just gets better and better. I should just document these guys for the rest of my blog and forget about other artists. Wait... is one of them dead?

Oh... oh my. Well, uh... that got depressing fast. Rest in peace, Rich Cronin. Damn. I need a moment.