CanTunes Tuesday: "Cheap Wine and Cigarettes" - Jess Moskaluke

I don't really cover a lot of country music here, and I'm kind of glad about that.

Country music is just so stupid these days. All this bro-douchey, let's go have a beer garbage. Whenever you find a decent country song these days, it's usually sung by a female.

In fact, I'm going to say it: Female country artists are better than male country artists. Especially these days, where the male country music is just way too smug and dumb to enjoy. I mean, that Blake Shelton song, "Cruise", "That's My Kind of Night"... ugh. I guess I've already done my song and dance on country, but here we have a female country singer hailing from Canada. Her name is Jess Moskaluke.

Hey yeah, hey yeah, hey. Well, it's a catchy melody at least. Now what's the subject matter here? Cheap wine and cigarettes? What about them?

I can’t put you down like 

Cheap wine and cigarettes

Oh, okay. I like the "toxic relationship" subject matter. I think it comes from a very real place, and is usually a lot more honest than a sappy love song. Okay, so slay me. How is this guy like cheap wine and cigarettes?

You’re like a curse 
You know I want you, crave you 
Wake up feeling worst

Okay... how is this guy like a curse, then? Is he a bad lay, but a good flirt? That's what i'm picking up from "wanting him" and then "waking up feeling worst".

Yeah but then the night comes around 
Baby I just can't put you down

You... haven't answered my question. How is he like a curse?

I can’t put you down like 
Cheap wine and cigarettes

Okay. stop for a second. HOW, IS HE LIKE, A CURSE? Or for that matter, how is he like cheap wine and cigarettes? You haven't explained anything! Here's the first verse:

You call me up 
When you get lonely 
You make me feel 
Like I’m the only one you love

There's nothing explicitly wrong here that the guy's doing. I mean, that last line kind of implies he has other lovers, but I personally just look at it as a really needy guy. Which could be a problem, but nothing that deserves the comparison to cheap wine and cigarettes, or a curse.

The song is catchy enough, I guess, but I can't excuse the clumsy songwriting. It sounds like she's trying to go for the "toxic relationship" subject, but failing at it. Honestly, there's not much evidence in the lyrics supporting either side of her feelings here. She says she can't get enough and all, but the only thing I see actually describing the guy beyond rude metaphors is the first verse, and it's pretty vague.

I would say that this song is like cheap wine and cigarettes, but that would imply I'm addicted to it. Which I'm not. Sorry, country music. You've failed me once again. So much for females being the saving graces of the genre.

I... I didn't mean it, Carrie! Please don't smash my nuts or whatever.